My Views on Love-Installment #2

It has been a little too long since I posted anything new... and the time has come for me to write! Many of you know I don't usually use the blog to write about new things in my life, as much as I write about ideas and the current musings of my mind. Let me see if I can do something that will appease both.

So, yes. I am engaged to be married. I got engaged June 13th at Red Butte Gardens and it has been a CRAZY ride since then. Mostly because I have no idea how to plan a wedding and those plans, combined with preparation for a new job teaching Kindergarten (starting just a little less than a week before I am married this Fall) was enough stress to throw me off into my wild orbits of craziness.

But, I want to say, I am very, very lucky. I am marrying a man who is kind, dedicated, loving, passionate, and my best friend. And, this leads me to an issue I wish to address.....

Most of you will remember my first post on love and my definition of love (love is having faith in someone). This definition is as true now as it ever was. However, since I started dating and since I got engaged, I have been VERY frustrated with Chick Flicks. Some of them make a mockery of love and faith. I am sorry if anyone is offended by this. I must admit, I still watch them... but to me, Love is not what the movies portray. It is not a hurried, flashy, gooey story where the man and woman fall deeply in love on the spot. I guess a prime example of this movie is Sleepless in Seattle.

Now, I love the movie for its humor and its hilarious portrayal of the differences between men and women. But, can we really believe that "magic" is the one and only thing people need to survive? No. Love is so much deeper than that. I agree there needs to be an element of passion and excitement, but to me love is literally a divine connection between two people. Not something strange and unknown.

Ok, so you say, "Katie, what chick flicks are good chick flicks?" Well, first let me preface these suggestions by saying they are not the typical "chick flicks." But I believe they do a nice job of showing different aspects of love.

If I were to pick a movie of the Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan vein, I think I would choose Joe Vs. the Volcano. I like the love story in this one. I also like how Joe Banks meets three different variations of Meg Ryan before they seem to connect and make a strong relationship. I think that is very true to life. In many ways we date and meet people who are "versions" of the type of person we are to eventually be happy with.

Um, another movie I love that seems to stand well against my standards....The Village. Yeah, I know. It is a scary movie, but the love story is soooo heart-warming. Love is the only virtue that can truly save us. Heck, I think Harry Potter incorporated that same theme too. (Note: Believe it or not, the love story in Walle was quite touching too and I cried. That is pretty rare for me, the heartless wench that I am, who never cries).

Though all of these movies are great, I still feel the best Love Stories were written by the All-Knowing Queen of Love, Jane Austen. Yes. I am sure any guy readers of this blog have now rolled their eyes or clicked off the page. But what I am trying to say is, that Jane Austen's love stories involve the exact elements that make love real. And NO, I am not talking about marrying millionaires. But, I am talking about a flawed man and a flawed woman, working through their own faults before they can love each other.
I am talking about two best friends who have grown up together and have never thought about love and then almost let fear stand in the way of their happiness. And I am talking about recognizing true love, over the flighty opinions of others. Or recognizing devotion and happiness over the prideful reckless behavior that can sting so badly. This is why I believe it.
The last element that makes Jane Austen's love stories REAL... the very real element of TIME. Love takes time. Love is all about Patience. I always think of Lizzie and Mr. Darcy and how much they had to go through before they got together. I think they learned a lot about each other and a lot about what true love is. But I bet things weren't always perfect after they were married, even if they were living in that trillion dollar mansion, Pemberly. But, I bet they loved each other enough to work through anything.

So, maybe in the future I can write a long list of the chick flicks that portray love as it really is. But I really just wanted to say I am grateful to of had the sense to recognize love in my own life. I understand the connection between two people and their own personal connection with God. I firmly believe you can't love someone until you love God and you love yourself. I'm just glad God wants us to be happy and that he is endlessly patient with me. Knowing that, has always given me the faith to love without fear.